How to Build Trust

Talk

One of the things that upsets 😡 me on a professional or relationship side is a lack of communication. I can't tell you how many times I have had paid professionals not communicate in an effective way that has lead to mistrust. "I will be there tomorrow at 8 AM." "I will be there at 2 PM." Nothing. I wait... nothing. Meanwhile, I am the one trying to bridge the gap of communication to find out what is going on. Yes, this is completely unprofessional yet many people struggle with this. In fact, I'm dealing with this right now and you just want to rip into the individual that isn't communicating especially because you are supposed to pay them and you want the work done! (Paying may or may not happen 😏) I believe many things could be solved if we talked even if we have made a mistake or won't meet a standard.


Trust

Relationships with your wife and children are built on trust. Trust grows through communication -- it cannot be built without it. I think of the relationships I have in my life; those relationships have been the strongest when more trust is developed. How did that trust get to that point? Communicating. If I have something on my mind that is bothering me, I need to talk about it with someone. If I bottle it up and let it sit then trust won't grow; trust with myself or anyone else for that matter. Pouring out whatever we are bottling up is hard but it is necessary to build trust.

   

Vulnerability 

Some of the scariest moments in my life are when I have chosen to be vulnerable. I lived many years of my life thinking that if I keep something in and just do my best then it will work out. I also thought this made me appear better and tough; like nothing could bring me down. The thing I failed to realize is this: vulnerability leads to greater trust. We sometimes think the opposite: "If I don't show any weaknesses then people will trust me." I have had to come to the realization that authenticity comes with vulnerability. It is okay to be imperfect and have weaknesses. People can relate to weaknesses and that helps them to also open up.

Embrace the Weakness

I'm not a golfer. I can count on my fingers how many times I have golfed. Sometimes my workgroup gets together and the majority want to golf. In my mind, I'm saying, "Oh great, not again. Maybe I should just skip out." The reason behind my wanting to skip? Looking bad. I'm a terrible golfer! But, understanding it is okay to be weak at something, I took the opportunity and went with it I had a great time. Did I still stink? Absolutely. The difference was I embraced my weakness and in turn, had a good time. I compare this to the times that I have let the weakness bother me because I felt too vulnerable and open and that led to frustration and anger.

I think the above video does a good job in describing principles of being honest with yourself and embracing your weakness(es) even if you may not be an addict. I especially like this quote from Elder Christofferson:

Success is progress. Progress is success. 

I know that as we are honest with ourselves and just realize that we may be terrible at something that it is okay. We can improve! We have help all around us that want us to succeed. The key is are we willing to talk and be vulnerable enough to develop greater trust?